I was at the point of my life were I had no idea were I wanted to be alive , dead or in prison, It was just a life were I was living in my own circle of hate, suffering, lost, and above all this ,I was hating the world around me, I kept reminded in my head you are no good, you have made to many mistakes in your horibel life, no one cares how you feel or think.
I had people who really Loved me including my Daughter and Granddaughter, and that was the only reason I kept pretending to be as happy as I can be, don’t get me wrong, I was always happy around them to, but the minute I was alone, my mind start to wonder, and become more stuck to the negative thoughts in my mind, I would Crie, Scream, Hit on the Wall or Knock on the floor what ever was in front of me. It was a strong feeling of pain, rejection of my own self.
I would date Men’s who really didn’t care for me, we’ll at least that’s how it seem at that time, So I would again grow more in the frustration, rejection, it was something I could not share with anyone, because something inside me use to say, no body cares for you , they don’t have time for your wining and complain, yup it was all in my mind.
Remember to trust in your Childrens!!!!
I knew I had a great Daughter who will always have the love and time for me, she has been a great example in my life.
How did Jesus come in my life?
Well I was in a Relationship with a Men who I thought he really loved me, but he didn’t , As I became closer to this Men, the Worst it was, It was a relationship were , I was not part of all his daily plans, he would like to drink alcohol and me as well, but he would focus on friends and normal routine on his own and other girls, I would say anything to catch his attention and it really was a waste of time.
So as years when by!
I kept Crying to God, I kept weeping and the more I was wondering about my life and this Men, the more hurt I was to the point of been Mentally abuse, and Emotionally, I felt like the most ugly girl in the world!
And God shows up!!!
How ? My Friend in Ocala who was serving the Lord at that time 10/09
Had a baby shower for her sister, and I was blessed to be invited, soon you will realize why I was blessed to be invited!
so on the date of thee event I was gathering my belonging to take of , I spoke to God in my mind, and this we're the words,
Father God I'm taking a skirt and a nice blouse so I can surprise my dear friend and go to Church with her the fallow in date which would be Sunday
so I did to funny to say later do you know, that I happen to be the one surprised.
You want to know !
First let me not forget to share on Saturday before the Sun Morning at Church was the Baby Shower were we Party, drunk alcohol, I smoke cigarettes, and Dance, took photos and had what I use to think was a great time, in reality nope it was just one of my horibel Sins day…
But the best part was the Sunday Morning, oh God yes the Sunday Bless Morning for this Broken Women, Yes me, I was so lost and Broken, But by the Grace of God, that Sunday Service I told my dear friend, let's go all the way in th the back, Yup no matter how much we HIDE he sees us and sees it all, He is the Great I Am GOD.
By the time they had altar calling, I was at the front on my knees, Crying out to the Holy Spirit, if you know I'm here you need to touch me, you need to tell me something, because I don't know what I'm doing here, I'm at the point to go to jail or just take my life away, God talk to me, I want to feel you like this people are feeling you.
Hallelujah, so Father God touch me in such a Powerful way that I can't explain, ever since that day, I became who I am today, because God makes all things New if we let him.
Glory to God I've been save since October 24 /2009
I Also Begin to serve at the Church I use to go with my Daughter in Ocasiónally but in a different way, I became hungry for God’s word and Direccion, and became a member to this Amazing Church.
Faith Assembly of God. .
And it’s been the best of my life to serve The Lord!
God has taken me on Missions to DR, CUBA, P R, and CT, I've serve in Choir, I've been lead to have Prayer Meeting for Single Womens, I've been Serving as well as Altar Prayer and now I'm out on the Rehabilitation Center with Senior s, lead Through the Holy Spirit.
I'm A Woman of God Broken for the lost, just like I once was. Please share how God saved me.
There's Millions of Women Men's, Senior s, and Children's Broken out in this World, if you help me, you are helping the one who goes before me, GOD!!!
Thank you so very much, To God Be all the Glory and Honor for ever and ever. Amen.
God Bless, you're Sister in Christ Wanda Gonzalez.
Jeremiah 33:3 NIV
Call to me and I will answer you and tell you great and un searchable things you do not know.